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How much a day? Three 6 packs Lady: How much per 6 pack Man: And how long have you been drinking? Do you know that if you hadn’t drank, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 15 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari? Where’s your fucking Ferrari then? Why can’t men get mad cow disease? At twenty we worry about what others think of us. At forty we don’t care about what others think of us.

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I mean, I get weirded out when people call me now. And texting guys is tricky, too! What if you text too much?

Home Club Information Member Of The Week Gallery One Gallery Two Interesting Fact Site Directory “An atheist is a guy who watches a Notre Dame-SMU football game and doesn’t care who wins.” ~ Dwight D. Eisenhower ~ Navy Jokes.

Joke about Australian sexual practices 1 Why wasn’t Jesus born in Sydney? They couldnt find three wise men and a virgin. The wombat, because he eats, roots, and leaves. Because they have to rush back to the pub to tell their mates what happened! An Australian man will actually search for a golf ball. Joke about Australian history A pom, fresh off the plane at Sydney airport, is trying to negotiate Australian customs.

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More Jokes for ya This joke page has lots more Jokes that will have you chuckling your head off. Some of the artists from the 60’s are re-releasing their hits with new lyrics to accommodate us elders Herman’s Hermits – “Mrs. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, “Now don’t get mad at me, I know we’ve been friends for a long time, but I just can’t think of your name!

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Setting Definition of Setting The setting of a piece of literature is the time and place in which the story takes place. The definition of setting can also include social statuses, weather, historical period, and details about immediate surroundings. Settings can be real or fictional, or a combination of both real and fictional elements. Some settings are very specific Wulfhall in Wiltshire England in , while others are descriptive a boat out on the ocean. Most pieces of literature include more—or many more—than one setting, either as the narrative progresses through time or to include points of view from more than one character.

Setting is a fundamental aspect of fiction, along with plot, character, theme , and style. The setting provides the backdrop to the story and helps create mood. Common Examples of Setting We use setting in just about every story, and even many jokes. When we tell even inconsequential stories we include setting, such as:

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If yee be looking for the best pirate jokes, then here they arrrrrrrrr. Did you know… One reason pirates wore eye patches was to help keep one eye adjusted to the dark for seeing below deck. The skull and crossbones flag used on pirate ships is called a Jolly Roger. Why was it so hard to call the pirate on the phone? Because he left the phone off the hook.

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His joke may have been filthier than a sack of compost, but it sure was funny. Some people like observational comedy, others split their sides for slapstick comedy, and surreal comedy can have an audience rolling in the aisles. But one really basic aspect of comedy is how clean or dirty it is. Mary Medlin and her colleagues from the University of Southern Mississippi, in research published recently in the journal Personality and Individual Differences, sought to find out whether women prefer men who crack dirty or clean jokes.

Using these ratings, they picked four dirty and four clean jokes that were about equally funny. Of course, the profiles were fake: Each one included one of the clean or dirty jokes and a photo of some random dude. The women rated each man for his attractiveness as a long-term partner — someone they could imagine marrying — and a short-term partner , or someone who might be attractive for a fling. Clean humorists were more attractive for both long- and short-term relationships , but the difference between dirty and clean humorists was most pronounced when women judged for a long-term relationship.

To put it another way, women were more willing to tolerate a filthy joke from a man when judging his attractiveness as a short-term hook-up.

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Is your dad Liam Neeson? Because I’m Taken with you Did you get those yoga pants on sale? Do you work for Domino’s?

A couple whose marriage was going on the rocks sought the advice of a marriage counsellor. The counsellor pleaded with them to patch up their quarrel, but they were adamant. “So,” said the counsellor, “you know the consequences and you want to part.

Old monitors are notoriously long lasting and provide a level of quality that is hard to get with a newer monitor. Also, even if your new computer does not have the right video output, there are still ways to run a cable with a converter and still keep the high quality. To hook up a new computer to an an old monitor, you will need: Determine what connectors you are using and have available. Generally you are working with two types of connections.

VGA connections have three rows of five holes or pins. DVI comes with a larger flat grid of holes or pins. If you have neither of these two connections, you’re probably working with HDMI, which looks like a longer, flatter hole or protruding connector. Computers, even laptop computers, generally still come with VGA outputs. If this is the case, just run a cable straight from the computer. Use a VGA cable that is male has pins, not pinholes on both ends.

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Pick Up Lines Girl, your so hot my zipper is falling for you! If I can’t get some love, I’d like to get a piece. On my last date, we played strip poker. We stripped, and I poked her. I just got out of Leavenworth. Can I steal you a drink?

To put it another way, women were more willing to tolerate a filthy joke from a man when judging his attractiveness as a short-term hook-up. In a follow-up study of new volunteers, Medlin was.

If yee be looking for the best pirate jokes, then here they arrrrrrrrr. This is the best collection of funny pirate jokes anywhere! These jokes about pirates are great for parents, teachers, Pittsburgh Pirate fans, coaches, babysitters and kids of all ages. Throwing a kids pirate party? These clean pirate jokes will bring lots of smiles and laughs to your pirate party. Are you a fan of the Pittsburgh Pirates? Then check out our Pittsburgh Pirates Jokes. Did you know… One reason pirates wore eye patches was to help keep one eye adjusted to the dark for seeing below deck.

The skull and crossbones flag used on pirate ships is called a Jolly Roger. Why was it so hard to call the pirate on the phone? Because he left the phone off the hook.

Pirate Jokes :: Pirate humor for scurvy sea dogs, arr matey!

His photos show the good-humored Latin American native — dark, handsome, and fit — in exotic destinations around the world, from Cairo to Capri. Riccardo and other Couchsurfing users quoted in this article asked to be identified by pseudonyms. On the business front, the crowdsourced hospitality site has been experiencing a rough patch lately. Although the company has initiated a doubling down on mobile, the experience of users like Riccardo might suggest another path to profitability.

I simply do not know of an easier way for a guy to get laid with exotic women in exotic countries. Never mind OKCupid and Tinder.

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What is funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume. What is the difference between a baby and a onion? No one cries when you chop up the baby. What is the difference between a dead baby and a water melon? One’s fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other one’s a water melon. What is the difference between a baby and a dart-board? What is the difference between a baby and a mars bar?

Why did the family take the dead baby along on the cookout? So they could light it and toast their marshmallows. Why was the dead baby kept in the kitchen drawer? The family used it to crack nuts.

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